Elul 1

Travel.  No matter how many plans we make, how prepared we think we are, when it comes to travel (and yes, I know, with life too) we never know what adventure lies before us. Recently, after a three-hour wait that should have taken 20 minutes at LaGuardia Airport, the Bellows Family had a high-anxiety full-on-melt-down. Two parents, two tweens and a teenager all ‘lost it’ simultaneously and in public. It wasn’t pretty. The Bellows feud endured for at least an hour until one of us managed to have a moment of clarity and was able to reign us back in from the brink.  The insults, tears, and screaming quieted down enough to hear the lesson that kindness and forgiveness can save us. That the answer for us was not dependent on whether the shuttle bus to the car rental place arrived, it rested on whether or not we were going to recognize that blame is not helpful, that harsh words are more painful than the wait, and that we are bound by love and not fear to each moment and to each other. Thankfully, it didn’t take long for this message to sink in and we could and did regroup. Calm settled in at the middle lane of the outside transportation line at LaGuardia. Kids apologized to their parents and to each other, parents said sorry to their children and to each other as well. It was a perfect reminder (albeit a rough one) of the message of Elul: sometimes we are not our ‘best selves’ and that is normal and stuff happens. To admit this and to say we are sorry can help return us to sanity and to a place of love, which feels so much better than standing in fear, blame and anger.

While I have no idea if a moment of clarity will surface during the next family meltdown, I am sure glad that we had this life-lesson together. #blogelul #blogelul2016